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Why we all fall in love with Mr Darcy, Our perfect Dreamdate discussed |
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 Apr 20 2008, 08:57 AM
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Waiting for Wednesdays
Posts: 8,742
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Location: Hiding from Hurricanes
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According to this poll reported on by The BBC, Mr Darcy tops the list of girl's "dreamdate."
Mr Darcy is many women's ideal male archytype.
* What is it about this character that we all find so attractive?
* Why do we  Mr Darcy?
* Does our Dreamdate influence our choice of partners?
* Are we not giving our "real" partners a fair chance expecting them to live up to this idea?
And guys - this is for you ...
* Do you find that women expect you to live up to this idea?
* Have you ever gone on a date and wondered "What would Mr Darcy do?"
Doris
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avatar by The Rockin Leaky Staff
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 Apr 20 2008, 10:24 AM
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Just Through the Brick Wall
Posts: 9
Joined: 6:59am October 7, 2007
Location: Small corner of the TARDIS
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QUOTE(DorisTLC @ Apr 20 2008, 01:57 PM)  According to this poll reported on by The BBC, Mr Darcy tops the list of girl's "dreamdate." Mr Darcy is many women's ideal male archytype. * What is it about this character that we all find so attractive? * Why do we Mr Darcy?
I suppose the thing about Darcy is the fact that, behind the pride, stemming perhaps from his up-bringing and character, he is quite a sensitive and generous man, plus he's also rich and good-looking, which always helps!!! 
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Get the shooty dog thing! |
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Apr 20 2008, 11:29 AM
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Hufflepuff Princess
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Joined: 2:04pm January 4, 2005
Location: Head Bartender at the Cauldron News Bar
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TWO WORDS...
COLIN FIRTH
*ahem*
Admitedly I adored Mr. Darcy the first time I read the book many many years ago, but frankly seeing the dashing Mr. Colin Firth as he SO PERFECTLY (yummily) portrayed him, I admit, shallow as it is, it swayed my mind and frankly enhanced the likability of the character in subsequent re-reads after seeing that film version of the book.
The cold reality, in my rather sadly real Bridget Jones like life I lead, there IS no Mr. Darcy (or heh Hugh Grant for that matter) duking it out over me, nor will there ever be any heroic rich upstanding moral (stuffy yet brimming with heaving loving and deep emotions)and darkly handsome man to come dashing to my rescue and sweep me off my feet. NOr in most cases do these type of hugely idealized men exist. Its all just a tale and I am most certainly NOT saying good men dont exist, for they do of course in mulitude.
Anyway, while its nice to daydream, Mr. Darcy is simply part of a wonderful tale and a nice fantasy, but to me I just view him as a literary Prince Charming, 18th Century British style is all.
This post has been edited by SueTLC: Apr 20 2008, 11:30 AM
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12/18/07: VICTORY FOR MY QUEEN HELGA HUFFLEPUFF
JKR:Hufflepuff did what was the most moral thing to do at that time...SU: She did not go around with a whip and say"Yah! You must work in the kitchens!"Right? JKR: No, definitely not. That would not be- No (SU: See?)Definitely not, John. SU: Thank you, Jo!
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Apr 20 2008, 11:33 AM
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Dominating the world, one poking stick at a time
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Mr. Darcy, to try and put into one word is just a gentleman. It's so hard nowadays to find that type of gentleman in the real world. He has the perfect combination of subdued arrogance, aloofness, and haughtiness; mixed in with pride, and loyalty. Mr. Darcy also has a dry wit that begs for more, and he is so intelligent; something that I have a weakness for. He also has this capacity for deep and meaningful love. Mr. Darcy is almost, and I hate to say this, the perfect man all around. That's why it is a standard that is difficult to live up to. I am sure many women look for the "Mr. Darcy" type in the real world.
And I second SueTLC's opinion of Colin Firth; that man is simply dreamy !!
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Apr 20 2008, 11:52 AM
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Just Through the Brick Wall
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Joined: 11:42am April 20, 2008
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Mr Darcy, in a lot of ways portrays simple human flaws that we all know exist: pride, arrogance and predjudice (not to steal an example from the title), yet he manages to overcome it, a trait i'm sure many women are banging their heads against doorjambs to get their men to do. At the same time, he displays his quiet demeanor and understanding by playing the hero behind the scenes, making his actions all the more meaningful because, unlike most men, he did it without expectation. Not to say anything against men in reality, but the simple fact remains that most people expect praise or acknowledgement for their efforts. Mr. Darcy did not. I think we all melt a little at that thought.
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Apr 20 2008, 01:06 PM
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Perusing the Magical Menagerie
Posts: 90
Joined: 11:40am April 20, 2008
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Look: good girls like bad boys. It's just the truth. At the beginning of the story, Mr. Darcy is a bad boy. I mean, look at what passes for good manners. We hate him, and so, of course, find him very attractive. (I know, I know, reason and love keep very little company... yadda yadda yadda.)
But Mr. Darcy does something incredible. He seems to become not so much a bad boy anymore. Our (because the reader is allied with Elizabeth) opinion of him becomes higher and his personality does begin to undergo some changes for the better. In fact, by the end of the novel, he has become quite a good man. Really, don't good girls love bad boys because they hope to transform them? A woman wants, as her romantic ideal, either a dark, mysterious stranger, or a shining, golden knight. Mr. Darcy is both.
- Quite apart from romantic interests- as a reader, I love Darcy the same way I love Snape. We begin to wonder, as things progress, if this guy is really everything that we first took him to be. They change. Our opinions of them change. In this, they just might be real people.
There might be real Mr. Darcys out there. Men whom we have misjudged. Men who become better over time. But they're almost certainly not that attractive. And it's highly unlikely that they have the modern equivalent of ten thousand a year.
Sigh...
ll
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Apr 20 2008, 01:20 PM
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A 'Sirius' Veil Whisperer
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Joined: 5:31pm August 30, 2006
Location: Siriusly Dreaming Somewhere
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Well the first Mr Darcy I fell in love with (yes, I've fallen in love with a few of them, not least Colin Firth  ) was Laurence Olivier. I was studying the book for OWLs, too many years ago to think about, and we were shown the black and white film he made with Greer Garson as Elizabeth. Its not a very close representation of the film but it had romance and I fell in love with Darcy there and then. As Lirene says, he's a gentleman, he will disadvantage himself before betraying a confidence, he's protective of those he cares for and feels a responsibility towards those who are dependent upon him. He's a man who would make the woman he loves feel cared for, loved and protected, he's intelligent and would expect her to match his intelligence and wit and thoroughly enjoy it, so he would be fun to be with. I agree with Auriga, he was prepared to do what is right for its own sake and have no-one know about it or expect their thanks.
I don't know that I would expect a real life partner to live up to all of that, its probably too much to expect, but in a fictional figure he's perfect, flawed or not.
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Jo's Book Nook is now reading Sense and Sensibility - just click on the image "THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED!" roared Black. "DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOUR FRIENDS, AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!" |
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Apr 20 2008, 01:49 PM
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Perusing the Magical Menagerie
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I have to agree with Sue on this one...  Colin Firth is completely drool-worthy... sigh...
Anyway, in all seriousness, though, I personally am not all that drawn to Mr. Darcy. If we're talking about Jane Austen characters, I would much rather have Mr. Knightley or Col. Brandon. (Why couldn't Colin Firth have played one of them...??) I think Mused hit the nail on the head though - Mr. Darcy is the stereotypical tall, dark and handsome type with the strong, silent personality. He's also a bit of a mystery-man, and who doesn't love a good mystery to sink their teeth into? He has everything that girls love about a "bad boy" with essentially none of the drawbacks. Honestly, he's a little too perfect, in my opinion... Who wants a perfect man? Heaven knows I'm not perfect, so that would be a lot to live up to...  My friend says that books and movies should have "happily ever after" endings, because that's the only place we'll ever get them. I, being more of a cynic, usually prefer a little more realism, but to each his own. Any way you slice it, though, we all do yearn for some sort of fairy-tale ending at some point and in some area of our lives, and I think Mr. Darcy fits the bill for a lot of people's fairy-tale prince.
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In memory of the constant through so much of my life,
and the spark who made us smile through the worst days.
Know that you both will always be deeply loved and missed. |
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Apr 20 2008, 03:13 PM
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Just Through the Brick Wall
Posts: 1
Joined: 3:00pm April 20, 2008
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Mr. Darcy is easy to fall in love with for many reasons. First, he's misunderstood. What Elizabeth perceives as haughtiness turns out to be perhaps a depression over concern for his sister. The story about how he treated Mr. Wickham turned out to be false, or rather not exactly false but skewed by Wickham.
Second, Elizabeth tells him things about himself to change, and he changes. Who wouldn't love that?
Third, Mr. Darcy is filthy rich, but also benevolent and in love with Elizabeth. In the words of my friend's mother, "You can fall in love with a rich man just as easily as a poor man."
That being said, I do not love Mr. Darcy as well as I love Mr. Knightley. I married a man who is a combination of Mr. Knightley and Mr. Bingley. They are slightly more realistic and flawed.
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