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POLL: A mother's love, or abandonment of a child?, So ... who was in the wrong? Merope ... or Tom?

POLL: A mother's love, or abandonment of a child?
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Total Votes: 396
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Narya View Member Profile	Jun 6 2007, 04:21 PM Post #1
Chief Mischief-Maker Posts: 8,572 Joined: 5:07pm January 28, 2005 Location: The Marauder's Map never lies ...	Time for a new Notable Magical Names poll! Many thanks to nympheart, who gave the NMN Mods this idea a while ago in our Welcome thread ... QUOTE That recent poll about the trio, the fight about Scabbers and Crookshanks and who was to blame is an interesting subject. And it reminded me of a similar dilema that I came across while reading HBP that's been nagging me for awhile now. This sort of ethical problem concerns Tom Riddle and Merope Gaunt and who the one in the wrong in their relationship. Tom left Merope while she was pregnant, but Merope used love potion to get him to marry her in the first place. Another interesting point is opinions on who suffered more for the experience. Is it possible for there to be a poll on this topic at some point in the future? Thanks! nympheart So ... we have our topic, and we have nympheart's introduction, setting the poll in context with its central issue of an ethical dilemma. Let's theorise on what this means for the characters at the centre of the question ... -------------------- Proud Gryffindor and OPAST member "Hallows," murmured Dumbledore, "not Horcruxes. Precisely."

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Replies (110 - 112)

wickedboy View Member Profile	Oct 22 2009, 09:40 PM Post #111
Daily Prophet Photographer Posts: 881 Joined: 1:35am January 6, 2007	Why would Tom Sr. help raise the child? Many women put children up for adoption when they have been brutally victmized and left with a child. That is what happened to Tom Sr. as well and he just allowed the child to be put up for adoption. The child is always innocent, but it would have been way worse if every time Tom looked at the child the whole event surrounding his birth came to mind and he mistreated the child as a result - or eventually went mad from the weight of the situation. Merope was a bit nuts and she ended up undertaking criminal behavior. But lots of criminals are nuts and we don't pity them or brutalizing others - we sanction their behavior. Tom Sr. was the absolute victim - and the worst thing he did was come from a hoity toity family and was good looking. That is no reason to be duped by a witch with love potion, intimately compromised and live as an outcast until the son she spawned killed him and all his loved ones in the house with him - then have his grave disgraced and his bones all pulled to pieces for a macabre wizard ritual. My god, how can anyone not feel sorry for Tom Sr.? -------------------- In Every Age, A Hero Rises...

fidelia View Member Profile	Oct 22 2009, 10:00 PM Post #112
Ollivander's Apprentice Posts: 1,994 Joined: 7:39pm March 11, 2007 Location: wandering in the Forbidden Forest, listening for the Phoenix song	QUOTE(wickedboy @ Oct 22 2009, 10:40 PM) Why would Tom Sr. help raise the child? Many women put children up for adoption when they have been brutally victimized and left with a child. That is what happened to Tom Sr. as well and he just allowed the child to be put up for adoption. The child is always innocent, but it would have been way worse if every time Tom looked at the child the whole event surrounding his birth came to mind and he mistreated the child as a result - or eventually went mad from the weight of the situation...... Tom Sr. was the absolute victim - and the worst thing he did was come from a hoity toity family and was good looking. That is no reason to be duped by a witch with love potion, intimately compromised and live as an outcast until the son she spawned killed him and all his loved ones in the house with him - then have his grave disgraced and his bones all pulled to pieces for a macabre wizard ritual. My god, how can anyone not feel sorry for Tom Sr.? Well, I'd disagree -- a bit. (But only a bit. ) Tom certainly would've had to be nuts to stick around and raise a child he fathered with a madwoman only under enchantment. And I agree -- he was, in essence, fleeing a rapist when he left Merope. shudder But I'd like to think that most people have an innate sense of protection towards a baby, particularly their own child. If Tom Sr knew that Merope was deranged and capable of criminal behavior, then surely his instinct should have been to get his child out of there? Why wouldn't he have cared what happened to his child? The thought of a baby being raised by someone who is morally bankrupt and a criminal capable of terrible behavior is nightmare-inducing. Now, I"m not saying that Tom Sr should have raised his son himself -- I agree that not everyone is capable of doing that -- but he surely could have alerted the authorities to the child's plight? That's a minimal first, ethical step to take. Or, how about using that Riddle wealth to check on the child, and ensure that he was alive and well? What about seeing to his son's needs, physical, emotional, and psychological? What comes across to me, from canon, is that the glimpses we are afforded of Tom Sr show someone who was selfish and fairly egotistical. In the series, we see the admirable adult characters putting themselves between children and danger -- think of Dumbledore's actions, of Sirius, of Lily, of James, and so on. And their goodness provides a stark contrast to how Tom Sr behaved. Tom didn't put himself in between his child and danger. His actions are self-serving only: he thought only of his own escape from Merope, and not the welfare of a child who could not escape without help. He didn't even try to help another, very helpless, victim of the circumstances. And that's a fairly huge ethical lapse. This post has been edited by fidelia: Oct 22 2009, 10:23 PM -------------------- Sorting begins soon for HBP! Follow the Lily and Stag on twitter, too! thanks, twiddlethosedials, for the siggy

GaryPotter View Member Profile	Oct 23 2009, 12:33 PM Post #113
Kibble Boy/Girl at the Magical Menagerie Posts: 308 Joined: 3:29pm August 10, 2005 Location: The Three Broomsticks lifting a pint or two with Hagrid	My mind is foggy and grey (it’s time for a re-read of the series) but do we know forsure that Tom Sr. was aware that Merope was pregnant? I certainly blame Merope for the entire incident, she used trickery, charms, spells, and potions to control the man she was obsessed over (can anyone say stalker). I can’t blame Tom Sr. for running when he had the chance, but, if he knew about his son . . . . . . I can’t see how anyone could not do everything within their power to protect (and raise) their own child regardless of how the child was conceived. -------------------- Gringotts Express . . . . Never disapparate without it W.O.M.B.A.T. 1 - Acceptable W.O.M.B.A.T. 2 - Outstanding W.O.M.B.A.T. 3 - Outstanding

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