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Posted by: MrCynical Aug 5 2008, 01:39 PM

This is a fairly insignificant point I guess but still one that intrigues me. Would Harry have invited the Dursleys to his wedding? If he did, would they turn up? Would all of them respond in the same way or would some attend and some not?

Posted by: cooncatbob Aug 5 2008, 01:53 PM

I've wondered about Harry relationship with the Dursleys post DH. Obviously they can no longer intimidate him.
I'd like to think he'd keep in contact with Dudley, maybe give him one of those small magic mirror so he could contact him.
Harry is a forgiving person so I think he would invite them, Dudley would probably go but I doubt that Petunia and Vernon would attend. I don't think he would invite Aunt Marge, forgiveness only goes so far.

I imagine that the wedding would take place at the Burrow.
It's one of my hope that someday JKR writes some short stories about Harry and the trio.
The Wedding of Harry and Ginny would make a great short story as would the Wedding of Ron and Hermione.

Posted by: !!LaurenaLongbottom Aug 5 2008, 01:58 PM

I feel inclined to think that he might have invited them, but like cooncatbob says I reckon only Dudley would have attended.
He might even have been happy to think Harry had found happiness! Hahah.
If he could get over the magic and the fact that no one was going to turn him into a pig that time....

Posted by: roonwit Aug 5 2008, 02:06 PM

We know Harry kept in touch with Dudley, and he and Harry's families met up occasionally, so I think that the Dursleys were invited to the wedding, but only Dudley actually came. Aunt Marge definitely wouldn't make the guest list because she doesn't know that Harry is magical so couldn't go to a magical wedding, and isn't Harry's relative anyway. Of course there is no way Aunt Marge would go even if she had been invited.

Posted by: MrCynical Aug 5 2008, 03:03 PM

I'm fairly sure that Marge would not have been invited and that Vernon would have been invited but refused to attend. My main puzzlement is with Petunia - after what JKR said about their parting in DH I'm not sure whether she truly hated Harry, or simply resented him as an extension of her sister and the fact that her sister had been taken from her by the wizarding world. One thing I'm sure of is that she would have made her own decision - Vernon seems quite easily intimidated by her (see for example the Howler incident in OP).

Posted by: RubyRose Aug 5 2008, 03:58 PM

I've been thinking a lot about the Harry/Dursley's relationship lately and I agree with those above!! I think that Harry is a forgiving person especially after having that darn horcrux removed and would have invited Vernon, Petunia, and Dudley to go. With forgiveness being a huge lesson for Harry to learn throughout the series and with Dudly and Harry being on respectable terms, I believe that Dudley (and his girlfrield/wife?) would have wanted to go. And after telling his parents of this news, I think that Vernon and Petunia would have gone to "protect" Dudley, lol. I think that it would have been a very healing opportunity for all involved, and after a few drinks I suspect that even Vernon and Petunia would have had fun!

Posted by: cooncatbob Aug 5 2008, 04:31 PM

I think you might be correct.
We don't know how living under the protection of Wizards has affected the Dursleys.
We do know that in spite of his up bringing Dudley has changed.
We also know that at their parting Petunia wanted to say something to Harry but couldn't.
As for Vernon in spite of his blustering Petunia is the one who really wears the pants in that family.

Posted by: hufflemuffinx Aug 5 2008, 04:38 PM

i think he would have eventually made contact with them, just because he knows why petunia despised magic, and would have invited them to the wedding. i think that only dudley and petunia would have attended (in my head, harry and dudley became friends, not close friends, but friends nonetheless and petunia eventually forged a relationship with her sisters son, but once again, not a strong one) i think petunia would have given an impersonal gift such as a punch bowl that harry and ginny would never use. i think that the dursleys would have been invited to the childrens birthday parties and other events.

Posted by: InfestedWithNargles Aug 5 2008, 06:21 PM

I think Harry would definitely have invited them, but I don't know if they'd all come. Dudley might, because he turned almost nice in the last book, but he might have been too afraid of all the magic to attend. If he got over that fear, I think Dudley would have gone. Vernon I think would be a definite no, unless somehow Dudley convinced him, but I really do not think Vernon would want to go, or would go. Petunia might. I don't think she would stay for a long time if she went, but I think she would go to the ceremony unless Vernon forced her not to.

Posted by: weaselyfan Aug 5 2008, 06:29 PM

I believe Mrs. Weasley, who would have been in charge of inviting people I'm sure, would have invited them because it would seem so shocking to her that they wouldn't want to come, but I agree only Dudley would actually come. The might have sent some sort of nasty gift (like the ugly vase she sent Lily for Christmas). Aunt Marge wuld nott have been invited, and on this note, I think Mrs. Figg would be the only other person from his old life that would have been included.

I think even if Petunia might have wanted to come, Vernon just couldn't bring himslef to, but she might have come with Dudley. Coming with Dudley would allow her to ocme and still save face.

Posted by: SnapetheGood Aug 5 2008, 06:43 PM

He would have invited them. They wouldn't have come and would probably have sent the worst possible gift.

Posted by: Ex Libres Cogito Aug 5 2008, 11:18 PM

I don't know where I got this strange idea that Harry and Giny eloped!

But neither Harry nor Giny wouldn't do that to her family. There have been previous threads over the last year about the relationships between Harry and the Dursleys (not quite sure what they were called, though).

My guess: Ceremony at The Burrow; Reception at Godric's Hollow, July 31, 1999.

Unless it says, or JK Rowling says otherwise.

ELC

Posted by: Cassy V Aug 6 2008, 03:05 AM

Lol, I think you're right. With Ron as best man, Teddy as the page boy and Victoire as the bridesmaid?!

Posted by: Ex Libres Cogito Aug 6 2008, 04:18 AM

With 2 officiating? i.e. Neville and Luna? I'm sure that Hermione would have been a nervous wreck. Can you imagine Dudley's first encounter with Prof. McGonagal???

Posted by: vandy Aug 6 2008, 04:34 AM

I'm sure he invited The Dursleys but they wouldn't have turned up.....They would've sent him comb(probably verin's idea) or something of that sort.

Posted by: thescarletttrain Aug 6 2008, 02:05 PM

harry, being the decent person he is would have invited them. vernon would not have come, but i think petunia and dudley would have come.
i think petunia would have felt a strong connection with her sister if she came, and would have felt bad for everything she had done to him as a child.

Posted by: blue4t Aug 6 2008, 05:00 PM

I'd have to say, yes, Harry invited the Dursleys to his wedding. Vernon probably spat at the invitation, tore it up, and threw it away. He probably tried to forbid Dudley and Petunia attending. But, I believe Petunia and Dudley attended. I believe, thanks to the war and all, Petunia has grown and is able to accept Harry and the wizarding world. Rowling has stated that Dudley and Harry stay in contact with each other and I believe she's said they attend each other's weddings, but I'm not positive on that.

Posted by: RhondaWeasley Aug 6 2008, 05:38 PM

I don't know, for the sake of peace it might not have occured to Harry to invite them. For all accounts and purposes he might have decided (in the end) parting in peace was enough. He might have considered it almost an interuption in there lives to invite them, if that makes any sense. Basically, if just the word magic sent them off it just would have been an altogether uncomfortable event for them. I see he and Dudley making peace on an individual level. Knowing of each other's lives in some vague way, sharing a Christmas card, a "how do you do" every few months, but not really sharing there worlds. I believe there's a deep sadness in Petunia that can't deal with her sister's loss and possibly never will. And Vernon, well he just can't deal.

Posted by: Ex Libres Cogito Aug 6 2008, 10:12 PM

OK, so let's back this up a bit. Molly and Arthur knew James and Lily well. If you ask Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, did James and Lily invite the Dursleys to their wedding? What about the Evans (Lily and Petunia's parents)? Do you think they came???

Posted by: hufflemuffinx Aug 6 2008, 10:18 PM

but the weasleys didnt know the potters well. it was known that Molly wasnt in the order the last time LV was powerful, and if i am not mistaken, arthur has actually said that he didnt know them well

Posted by: Gin3vra Aug 6 2008, 10:44 PM

Two thoughts here.

First, I am actually inclined to agree with Rhonda Weasley. I think Harry would have felt that involving the Dursleys in any aspect of his life, magical or otherwise, was poking the sleeping dragon. I do like to believe that he and Dudley were able to reconcile some sort of relationship and at least keep up with one another. But, again that was a case where the ingrained fear of magic was just too deep and the trauma too great. I think, certainly, he rang him up and let him know about the wedding. But, in Harry's own kind way, saved Dudley having to make up some excuse by saying, "I know you can't be there, but I wanted to let you know." And, as for the rest of the family, we know Vernon's a lost cause but is pretty much going to go along with Petunia. So, that is really the crux isn't it? Where do Harry and Petunia stand. I like to believe, that once the dust settled from the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry reached out to his aunt, particularly after witnessing her alienation from Lily. I think they came to an understanding that she didn't hate him and he didn't hate her, and they are what we would refer to as distant relations; the kind who get a nice Christmas newsletter each year, just to keep them in the loop. So, the short answer is, yes they were invited, but more as a courtesy invite; those family members you invite but you know won't come and might send something useless.

Second, to respond to ELC, if I am interpreting your point correctly, yes, I am willing to bet that Lily invited Petunia (and possibly Vernon as "and guest") to her and James' wedding. I think Lily would have continued over the years to try and recover her relationship with her sister. And, I am also willing to bet it's a big fat NO as far as attendance. Yes, I am sure they invited Lily's parents to the wedding and I am sure they came. From what we learn about Mr & Mrs Evans in PS/SS, they are ecstatic that Lily's a witch and would have celebrated with her each new milestone in the magical world, or muggle world for that matter. It was only Petunia who felt abandoned.

Posted by: toffus Aug 8 2008, 04:15 AM

I don't think they would be invited. Harry had 16 terrible years at the Durlseys, and they have no wish to have contact with wizards.

Posted by: mathew dumbledore Aug 8 2008, 10:10 AM

I think that Harry invited the Dursleys and that they went to the wedding, because this wedding meant more distance of the Dursleys to Harry and the magic world.

Posted by: moony_lupin Aug 9 2008, 03:21 PM

I also think that Harry invited the Dursleys to the wedding, but that only Dudley came. I think once Dudley grew up a little after the Dementor incident he would not be averse to seeing magic performed among the wizarding community and so would feel comfortable attending Harry and Ginny's wedding, which took place at the Burrow I think, and perhaps even enjoyed himself.

I agree that Vernon would be a lost cause and in no way would think of attending. Petunia might think about it and then decide against it. Dudley would have been an adult by then so he could do what he likes. And I can see Harry and Dudley keeping in contact in later life, with the annual Christmas and birthday cards, phone calls, and visiting each other every few years. I expect the Potter-Weasley kids and the Dudders kids would get on like a house on fire.

Posted by: hellostarshine_1981 Aug 9 2008, 03:49 PM

hmmm this is a toughy...I too think that at least Dudley would have gone. I think realizing that Harry saved would make him want to be there. Petunia wouldn't have gone because she hated the fact that she got called out on the fact that Harry was put in her care and she allowed him to be treated badly *also treated him badly herself* and getting called out on the fact that Dudley had been turned into a spoiled brat. So yeah Dudley would be there

Posted by: Kagoma Aug 9 2008, 10:54 PM

i think that at list duddly would of come at the end they stiled thing before they had to lev right??????

Posted by: DumblondKatie Aug 9 2008, 11:41 PM

I do like to think that Petunia and Dudley came to the wedding, but in reality ( Well, if JKRowling wrote about it) I dont think they would have them come. I doubt Harry would have even thought abvout inviting them, because, well, I dont really think he counts them of as family or even people he wound think about at all. He did want them to be happy, and alive, wich is why they left. He just wouldn't have botherd them mafter that.

Posted by: Cassy V Aug 10 2008, 02:46 PM

It would be worth inviting Dudley just to see him re-introduced to Ron & George... not to mention Hagrid.

But I think it's nice that he and Harry are able to salvage *something* from their shared past. I also think that Harry is forgiving enough to invite him to the wedding (& he is, after all, Lily's relation). I imagine that Dudley feels guilty about his years as a bully and would want to make it up to Harry if he could. And it's Dudley who says, "See you, Harry." (DH3)

Could Petunia bear to attend? Would Harry want to invite her? I don't know... it would depend on whether she and Harry have actually had a conversation after 'Snape's Worst Memory'. I wouldn't expect too much there (IMHO, Petunia had her last chance at the end of DH3 and "a little jerk of her head" doesn't begin to cover it)...

Posted by: BeAchL0veEr05 Aug 10 2008, 04:59 PM

I think Harry did invite the Dursleys, and I think they showed up. I doubt they talked to Harry much; I think things were kind of awkward after DH. I'm not sure Vernon would have wanted to come, but Dudley might have wanted to come, so therefore Petunia would show up, and I think Vernon would have tagged along too. Vernon probably would have probably tried to leave early, but he would have come to the ceremony.

Posted by: dobby_rocks Aug 17 2008, 08:23 PM

I think he might have invited them but I think only Dudley would have come, maybe Petunia. I don’t think Molly and Arthur knew James and Lily well at all. Seriously they were not in school together and we know they were also not in The Order during the first war.

Assuming one or both of Lily parents were still alive when Lily married I am sure they attended. Why wouldn’t they? As Tueny said they were happy to have a witch in the family.

Posted by: Mistressofthedarkarts Aug 18 2008, 10:17 PM

Oh, can you imagine that reunion? It would be priceless!

I agree with everyone who says that Dudley would be the only one to turn up to the wedding. I think he'd have a better relationship with Harry, now that we've seen how much he's changed. It would be really nice for him to be there. I don't think his role in the wedding would be greatly significant, though.

Posted by: bleedingmeMCR Aug 18 2008, 11:14 PM

I think Dudley wouldn't show up, but tell Harry congratulations or something, but I really don't think he'd show up to the wedding, he'd feel so out of place. I do have a feeling Petunia might show up, since she is the most accepting, and of course Vernon would never in a million years even think of showing, I doubt Harry would even bother writing his name on the invitation.

Posted by: priestess101 Aug 21 2008, 07:29 PM

I think that harry could of possibly invited dudders to the wedding. It made me proud of duddley in deathly hallows where we finally see him shake his parents stupid prejudices and finally think and speak his own mind for once in his life. I'd like to think that dudders turned up to see his cousin again. As for petunia and vernon not a chance harry would invite them. Why would he want to . I mean Even after everything petunia couldnt even give her nephew a hug knowing it was probably the last time she would ever see harry again. Petunia proved she would carry her grudge aganist her sister to the grave. As nice a guy that harry is I think he knows a lost cause when he sees one.

Posted by: lily-luna-potter Aug 23 2008, 09:57 AM

out of all of them dudly would be the most likley to be invited as jo said they were on chrsitmas card terms (or something like that..not sure where i read it) although i doubt he would actually end up coming..he would feel as though he shouldnt be there with all the wizards and witches surrounding him...so out of place unless of course harry invited mrs figgs who could keep dudley company and (if she came) aunt petunia

Posted by: morgiana Aug 24 2008, 07:00 PM

I think Harry would invite the Dursleys, even if he does so only as a courtesy without real expectation of their attendance. But I think Dudley would be willing to attend, considering that he finally made peace with Harry in DH and keeps in contact with Harry after the war. However, I doubt Vernon and Petunia would go UNLESS Dudley somehow manages to convince them to go (just as he convinced them to go into hiding under the protection of wizards and witches in DH). Even then, Vernon might refuse. Petunia might be willing to send a gift, though...maybe a duplicate of that vase that she once sent to Lily.

Posted by: Sirius_isn't_dead Aug 26 2008, 07:01 AM

I believe harry would invite dudley and DUDLEY would go because Jo says that they were on about "christmas card terms" Post DH.

Posted by: fd24 Apr 3 2009, 03:31 AM

I believe that no matter how out of place Dudley might have felt at the wedding, he would have come. Vernon would have probably not come but Petunia would have come. I like to believe that Harry and Dudley got along and Harry showed Dudley some good magic. Petunia would have gotten over her grudge she had with her sister. She too would have probably forgotten the whole thing and been at good terms with harry

Posted by: vaudree Apr 3 2009, 12:07 PM

I think that Harry would invite the Dursley’s to his wedding.

Dudley would want to go for sure. Vernon would be “relaxed” thinking of Harry finally out of his life so he would probably not be checking the mail (not being one to eagerly anticipate his credit card bills). Petunia will open up the invitation, debate about going or not going and whether or not to tell Vernon for a few weeks. The night before the wedding, Petunia will tell Vernon that she is going to visit Dudley (which is the truth) and will attend the wedding with her son and his girl-friend Millicent Bulstrode.

Hey – if Dudley has kids about the same age as Harry, he has to have someone!

JKR says that Harry’s kids do not like spending time with Dudley’s kids – is it because Dudley lets them away with bloody murder or is it because Dudley’s kids know nothing about the magical world – meaning that Harry’s kids cannot say or do almost anything?



Harry never considered Aunt Marge his real aunt and resented being forced to call her “aunt” – which is a bit rich because she technically is. I doubt that Harry would invite her to his wedding – he wants it to be a happy occassion.



That is a good point. We find out that Petunia started hating the wizarding world because she felt excluded from it. Harry would probably feel that excluding Petunia from his wedding would be excluding Petunia from the wizarding world all over again.

Hey, don’t scoff at a punch bowl – it is handy for putting Halloween treats in for handing out at the door – and for making swamp water (a mixture of different soft drinks). The definition of an “impersonal” gift is money – not something you picked out. A gift is a tangible way of showing the intangible – one’s love. Petunia’s tastes may be different from Harry’s – she likes salmon and other pastel orangy pinks - but I think that Luna and Ginny together would be creative enough to find a way to give the gift a place of honour without it clashing too much with the rest of the furnishings – and / or breaking.

What would Dudley give as a gift? I think that Dudley and Petunia would be stuck at a table with Arthur and Zenos talking about batteries, green energy alternatives and the Loch Ness Monster (the Granger’s being smart enough to avoid the two of them). Then Arthur and Zenos would go into apocalyptic shock when Dudley brings out his crackberry. Ron finally rescues Dudley and introduces him to his collection of Martin Migg comics. Dudley’s reaction would be similar to mine when Jon Stewart’s moment of Zen was the Prime Minister talking French (which is sort of part of the job description) and beavertails. Dudley then introduces Ron to X-men.



Molly would insist on making sure none of the Weasley relatives were left out for sure – and this would have been independent of who Harry marries - since she honestly considers Harry one of her kids and has for a long time. However, the bride and groom usually have the final say since they need to invite friends as well as relatives. I am sure that more than a few OP and DA members would be on the guest list.

Personally, I think that Kreacher would consider it a personal insult if he did not get a hand in planning the wedding (ie set up, food etc).



Ron as best man, of course. Between Ginny, Luna and Hermione – I will let you assume the bride and the two bridesmaids. Teddy and Victoire would both be mere kids at the time – so ring boy and flower girl.



Vernon knew that Petunia had a sister but did not seem to have met her in PS/SS just before Harry ended up on the door step. Petunia, however, was sending Christmas presents to her, so she was not completely estranged from her and still making the effort to have contact with her at that point. I get the impression that Lily could care less about her sister at that point – because of her cavalier attitude towards the vase. The difference between attending the Potter’s wedding and attending the baby shower would be that Petunia had a baby who was on the verge of speaking so she could not very well go to Harry’s shower without telling Vernon – or Vernon finding out.



I think that Harry’s friends would go to great lengths to be sure than nothing happens to spoil the wedding and that the guests are kept as comfortable as possible. George would have been mellowed after the death of his instigator brother. Someone would be in charge of keeping Molly away from Petunia so that she doesn’t make a generous gift of a very large piece of her mind. I doubt that Harry wants his wedding to end up on the wizarding version of Funniest Home videos.

Posted by: fathergod Apr 3 2009, 01:00 PM

To be honest, I think they all would of come, even Marge!

Dudley of course would come and he or Petunia would of pressured Vernon to come also. I think Petunia never disliked Harry but whenever she saw him, it brought back the feelings that the "wizardly world" killed her sister.

Vernon would of invited Marge just to be who he always has been. A jerk to Harry!

Posted by: the_boy_who_lived Apr 3 2009, 01:03 PM

I don't think that Harry invited the Dursleys. And I think there are several reasons for this:
1) He would be certain that Petunia and Vernon would not come.
2) Without his parents, and knowing no one else there, Dudley wouldn't come. And Dudley just ended up on speaking terms with Harry after all. Instead of hating Dudley, Harry is most probably "neutral" towards him now.
3) Harry has no emotional bind with Pet and Vern. Petunia could have mended that before they left 4 Priv but she instead chose not to.
4) Harry wouldn't want Vern & Pet at the wedding anyway, why would he?

Posted by: Athenamalfoy Apr 3 2009, 01:22 PM

Dudley would not send a have come to the wedding,but might have send
a toaster or something like that.
I don't think that Harry and Dudley woould be that buddys with each other
they could have be in good terms but not need a good friend term its to
much history with each other.

Posted by: Owain Apr 3 2009, 01:33 PM

I don't think there's any real danger of anyone doing anything to spoil the wedding. The Dursleys have already gotten firm talked to rather harshly by Dumbledore, Hagrid, and Hestia among others. Besides, at Bill's wedding, Molly didn't even like the bride. She still didn't do anything to ruin the special moment.
I doubt she would over the likes of Vernon Dursley. Anyway, here's my estimate of the wedding party.

Groom: Harry Potter
Bride: Ginny Weasley
Officiating: Kingsley Shacklebolt
Best Man: Ron Weasley
Groomsmen: Neville Longbottom, Seamus Finnigan, and Dean Thomas
Maid of Honour: Luna Lovegood
Bridesmaids: Hermione Granger and two Gryffindor girls from Ginny's year
Parents of the Bride: Arthur and Molly Weasley
Standing in for the Parents of the Groom: Rubeus Hagrid and Minerva McGonaggal
Ringbearer: Teddy Lupin
Flowergirl: Victoire Weasley
Guests: Charlie Weasley and guest, Bill and Fleur Weasley, Percy and Audry Weasley, George and Angelina Weasley, Muriel Weasley and guest, Gwenog Jones and guest, Pomona Sprout and guest, Filius Flitwick and guest, Horace Slughorn and guest, Dr. and Dr. Granger, Vernon and Petunia Dursley, Dudley Dursley and guest, Dedalus Diggle and guest, Elphias Doge and guest, Aberforth Dumbledore and guest, Arabella Figg and guest, Mundungus Fletcher and guest, Hestia Jones and guest, Sturgis Podmore and guest, Lee Jordan and guest, Kreacher, Augusta Longbottom and guest, Andromeda Tonks and guest, Hannah Abbott, Katie Bell and guest, Susan Bones and guest, Terry Boot and guest, Lavender Brown and guest, Cho Chang and guest, Michael Corner and guest, Dennis Creevey and guest, Justin Finch-Fletchley and guest, Anthony Goldstein and guest, Ernie Macmillan and guest, Padma Patil and guest, Parvati Patil and guest, Alicia Spinnet and guest, Oliver Wood and guest, Demelza Robbins and guest, Ritchie Coote and guest, Jimmy Peakes and guest, Aurora Sinistra and guest, Sybill Trelawney and guest, Firence and guest, Grawp, Poppy Pomfrey and guest, Rolanda Hooch and guest, Winky and guest, Gabrielle Delacour and guest, Viktor Krum and guest, Rolf Scamander, the other Gryffindors in Ginny's year and guests, the two unnamed Gryffindor girls in Harry's year and guests, the dates of Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas (if not among those already mentioned), the dates of Ginny's two unnamed bridesmaids (if not already mentioned), the family of Dir Cresswell and (after this much time) a guest of the widow Cresswell and the older sons, and the rest of the extended Weasley clan

Posted by: vaudree Apr 3 2009, 07:24 PM

I had Molly and Arthur down as Parents of the Groom - because Molly has considered Harry a son for years.

I think that they would set up a chapel at Bill and Fleur's because I think that Dobby would like to see Harry happy and Harry would like to spend some time alone at Dobby's grave thanking him for saving their lives and telling him that this day would not be possible without him. Any way, there are a lot of beautiful flowers.

I don't think that Kingsley could perform the wedding - because Paul Martin/Stephen Harper, George Bush/Barack Obama and Tony Blair/Gordon Brown can't.

I know that captains of ships can, though.

But he is still family and coming is the honourable thing to do.

Posted by: Owain Apr 3 2009, 08:41 PM

You might be right.



At his wedding? I don't think a grave is the appropriate symbolism there. Harry has lost a lot of friends and family and he feels that loss deeply. Same for Ginny. Still, the wedding is about celebrating their love with the people they care for and who care for them. Yes, the dead are there in spirit but do you really want to mix marriage with mourning? If so, why would Dobby take precedence over James and Lily for Harry or Fred for Ginny? They cared for him but family is family.



The Minister of Magic seems far more powerful. All power seems toi flow from him. Also, we don't see anything like Wizarding clergy.

Posted by: roonwit Apr 4 2009, 04:26 PM

Actually we do. The same person officiates at Dumbledore's funeral and Bill and Fleur's wedding. We aren't told whether he has a religious role or a civil role, but it definitely seems as if these sort of ceremonies have to be performed by a particular person or someone employed in a particular role.

Posted by: hannah abbot ;) Apr 4 2009, 05:53 PM

Harry would have definitely invited the dursleys to his wedding. I Think Dudley would have gone. I hope that Petunia went, i don't really care about Vernon... and i don't think he would have gone, and if he had i hope some one like ron or george or another weasley or Hermione or Hagrid or someone but him in his place..( like mmake him feel really really bad)But i hope that when the Dursleys went into hiding with Dedalus Diggle and Hestia Jones, that Dedalus and Hestia told them everything Harry had been through ; all the voldemort encounters, explained about the OOTP, maybe spoke about sirius and showed them that he is a wizarding hero.

I want Petunia to go because it's her only nephew and just for Lily's sake. And i don't know why but i half feel sorry for Petunia and half really dislike her. If she just attended the ceremony and maybe left at the reception, that would be acceptable. But i hope she maybe met someone at the wedding who was like " hi, your Lily's sister?" and started to her about Lily. I mean even Harry could do that... like maybe post DH write a letter to Petunia telling her about Snape's memory.

But i think she would have at least hopefully enjoyed it. I think Dudley would have been pretty amazed at the ceremony.. and i think that if they went they could Harry being really Happy around them.. for once.

Posted by: proflarkin Apr 4 2009, 06:27 PM

I think that Dudley would come,but might leave the first chance he got, Petunia wouldnt, and Vernon would have blown up as soon as he saw the invite

Posted by: Mel golfer Apr 4 2009, 08:17 PM

Okay, no im sorry but i do not think that they would have been invited at all.
If anything, Dudley would have came.
But Petunia, or Vernon i dont know
Would Harry even invite them? in my opinon i dont think he would at all.

Posted by: vaudree Apr 5 2009, 12:53 PM

You bring up a point, which may explain your mixed feeling towards Petunia. Vernon never wanted Harry in his home and went out of his way to make Harry as uncomfortable there as he could. Vernon did not care what happened to Harry as long as he was finally rid of him.

Petunia could have done much much better by Harry. However, she was also in the difficult situation of keeping Harry in their home despite the fact that Vernon did not want him there.

Some, though not all, of Petunia's mistreatment of Harry was an attempt to make Harry more presentable to Vernon. Petunia's haircuts reflected her conflicting goals. She kept Harry's bangs long to cover the scar - because she desired both to keep Harry safe and to keep her family safe when they were with Harry. She tried cutting the rest of Harry's hair short so that Vernon would have one less thing to dislike about the boy. Harry's punishment in COS after pretending to perform magic was because Vernon had threatened to kick Harry out if he performed (or possibly even threatened to perform) magic.

That said, Petunia may have been able to give Harry treats, but didn't. I say "may have been able to" since Petunia would have had to have done so in a way in which it would not have gotten back to Vernon. Harry, despite Vernon's efforts to make him downtrodden was very outspoken. Dudley was half bully and half normal brother-like creature - both halves unlikely to keep Harry getting a treat secret.

We learn what "Remember My Last" meant - the letter that DD had sent Petunia denying her entry into Hogwarts. It is hard to know how noble or how selfish Petunia's actions were in light of that. Petunia knew that giving Harry stay there would both keep him alive and bring danger on her family. Petunia also knew what Vernon's reaction would be if he found out about her desire to attend Hogwarts. Snape may have wanted both Lily and Mulciber (according to JKR), but Petunia wanted both to keep Harry safe and hold onto Vernon - also two conflicting goals.

What we don't know is the influence of their stay under the protection of Dedalus and Hestia.

Dudley had had bad experience with wizards before hand - with Hagrid's tail and the twin's candy - but it was him who decided to put his life in the hands of these wizards. Part of the reason was because he feared the Dementors more than the Wizards and part of the reason was because Harry saving him may have given him the impression that not all wizards were bad (as well as dementor memories reminding him of his own episodes of bullying). Dudley, of the three, would have been the most receptive to Hestia and Dedalus's attempts to make them comfortable. Dudley would have lost his fear of wizards and would have known at least two people at Harry's wedding besides the groom - candy boy, room blower up man, cat lady, and pig tail producing big guy. Dudley would have found out more about what the fight was about - because there wasn't much else to do and this would be more understandable than trying to comprehend what Quidditch was.

Vernon only went with Hestia and Dedalus because of Dudley - and probably would have continued the debate whether or not he would have been better off if he had not gone the whole year he was under protection. Vernon would do nothing but complain both about the state of his care and how, in his opinion, Harry had brought this danger and inconvenience upon them. Vernon would have emerged from the experience even more convinced that they should have never taken Harry in.

Petunia would have been filled with guilt and conflicting loyalty. Vernon would have made her feel like she had brought this down on the family. Petunia would also chastise herself for not wishing Harry luck like she had tried to but didn't. Petunia would become upset at the talk about how noble the cause was - probably admitting both her desire for Lily to stay with her in the muggle world and for her desire to go to Hogwarts to be with Lily in the process. Vernon would become very upset so they would wipe his memory - but Dudley would know.

Seems that a lot of the story happens off stage. The year in care with the wizards while Harry was trying to find Horcruxes would have impacted the Dursleys in ways we could only guess at. What happened there would affect both whether Dudley and Petunia attended the wedding and their understanding of the wizarding world when they got there.



While Hestia and Dedalus was doing that, Dudley would not have much choice but to listen - there being nothing else to do. How much would any of this matter to Vernon? He would hate Harry even more for getting him involved in this.

Even if they told him of the Muggle killings the DE did for fun, Vernon would still see himself as immune (if Harry hadn't involved them in this). Vernon lived in a quiet "respectable" neighbourhood of home owners where any stranger walking down the block was immediately suspect.

The other question would be whether Vernon was still alive by the time the wedding occurred, because of his unhealthy lifestyle - and clogged arteries.



Petunia hated Snape because she blames him for taking her sister away from her. It was Snape who first told Lily that she was a witch and about the wizarding world. Petunia, I think, hated James for pretty much the same reason.

Petunia had felt unwelcome in the wizarding world since receiving that letter and wondering how welcome she would feel may have made her hesitant to come. I think people who knew Lily talking to Petunia about Lily would be a nice gesture. The vase that Petunia had given Lily for Christmas just before she died is proof that Petunia still cared for her sister. I am not even sure that Vernon knew that she had given her sister a Christmas present. Thank you for thinking of it.

Posted by: Owain Apr 5 2009, 02:10 PM

I always assumed he was simply a Ministry functionary, something like a justice of the peace. That was why I thought a sitting Minister would have all the rights of a lower official. The Wizarding World certainly doesn't seem to respect anything like the independence of the civil service. Scrimgeour wouldn't have wanted to use this power but Kingsley seems much more personable.

Posted by: vaudree Apr 5 2009, 02:40 PM

It is hard to tell whether the person was a Minister or a JP.

I think that part of the problem is that JKR is trying to make the ceremony seem Christian but nondenominational.

I did not notice whether or not it was the same person at both DD's Funeral and Bill and Fleur's wedding. If it was, the guy at DD's funeral seemed quite old and Harry did not seem too impressed with him. The guy seemed to use the same generic platitudes that Slughorn used for Aragog - a sign that he did not know DD very well and/or the way Harry did.

MOM seems to be a busy position - if one wishes to do the job right, though. While Kingsley could make an exception for Harry, I doubt that he would like to take too much time away from his other duties to perform weddings as a rule.

Whether the person is a religious official or a JP (Ministry offical), I am wondering it it would be one of the students at Hogwarts - or even Bertram Aubrey.

I would picture an Easter wedding for Harry - both the symbolism of rebirth (Harry chose to live after Voldemort avadaed him in DH rather than continuing on) and because Harry liked wild flowers.

p. 92 (DH 6) – “… the nearby garden had been pruned, plucked and generally spruced up, although Harry, who liked it in its usual overgrown state, thought that it looked rather forlorned without its usual contingent of capering gnomes.”

Posted by: The Crimson Artist May 9 2009, 08:16 AM

As for the Dursley question, I actually think Harry would invite them though he wouldn't actually expect them to come. I think he would carry on the tradition created between Petunia and Lily (as symbolized by the vase sent as a gift). Neither particularly likes one another, but they still recognize the blood they share.

Posted by: SilverDragoness May 10 2009, 09:20 AM

I think that Harry would've invited them, and if he didn't -- I'm sure that Molly would have (she seems that type of person).

If they were invited, I would say that Dudley would probably come, and Petunia as well. Vernon is the toss up, I can see the one point brought up that he might go just to 'protect' Dudley, but at the same time I can't really picture him being able to stomach going to a wizard function.

Posted by: Ginevra86 May 10 2009, 09:46 AM

I've definitely been reading too much fanfiction, haha... but I've always thought that Harry invited them, but only Dudley came... and then Dudley meets up with one of the girls at the party....

yea... definitely been reading a little too much fanficion

Posted by: scarymissmary28 May 10 2009, 10:23 AM

Ι believe,like most people replied,that Harry did send an invitation to the Dursleys but only Dudley showed up.We see his change of attitude in Deathly Hallows,we see he's not such a git.I'm sure that after the war he and Harry were on friendly terms.I also think that Petunia wanted to go to the wedding but Vernon didn't let her.Vernon wouldn't have wanted them to go of course and I don't think Petunia would fight with him over it.

Posted by: the_boy_who_lived May 14 2009, 10:43 PM

I think if anyone, he invited only Dudley. Vernon and Petunia couldn't even say goodbye to him. I doubt that 16 years of being mistreated goes away very quickly.

Posted by: 3 Weasly Twin May 14 2009, 11:30 PM

I think that only Dudley would have gotten an invitation to the wedding. Harry and Dudley's relationship towards each other may have improved over time, therefore making it appropriate to invite him (and his wife, if he has one). As for Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon, I think that they would have felt too out of place to want to stay at a wizard gathering. After all, they kept on calling them freaks. Therefore making it really awkward. Then againg, they could have changed, but not likely! In conclusion, Dudley would have gotten an invitation, but not Aunt Petunia or Uncle Vernon.

Posted by: LassieLupin May 15 2009, 11:49 AM

Dudley was remorseful in book seven and Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon were too concerned about their own lives to realize what the war and dangers meant for Harry, they didn't even know what he was doing that year - they didn't want to know.

But besides that, I feel like that Harry and Ginny's wedding was smaller than people are imagining. I mean, if the wedding were as huge as:

I feel like they'd get married quietly, directly after Ginny graduated, perhaps:

The Weasleys, Hermione, Neville, Dean, Seamus, Andy Tonks and Teddy, Hagrid (maybe McGonaggal) and maybe Angelina and Katie and Alicia and Oliver. I think it would be very small because Harry wouldn't like something that huge...

Posted by: felixismycat May 15 2009, 12:51 PM

I'm fairly sure Harry would invite Dudley, Vernon and Petunia. I think that Dudley would probably come if invited. I think that Petunia would want to come as she seems to understand that Harry is family. She is frightened by the wizarding world but she still cared about Lily and so cares about Harry somewhat. However Vernon is the main problem and he might try to persuade Petunia not to go. I doubt that he would want to go at all so maybe Petunia would just go with Dudley.

Posted by: potterish10010 May 16 2009, 09:05 AM

I do think that for sure The Dursley's would have been invited. It would have been huge for their relantionship. But I do agree that Harry and Ginny would have a smaller wedding. Probably the Weasly clan, their really good Hogwarts friends and maybe some teachers(Hagrid and McGonnagall), Teddy and for sure Kreacher. Oh and maybe some of the Order, although Kingsley would probably be the priest for them. So not supper small but not all of Hogwarts

Posted by: Silvergale May 16 2009, 10:44 AM

Posted by: HudMug1712 May 16 2009, 11:27 AM

But Marge's memory was wiped so she never remembered being blown up.

so i dont thinks that's why she wouldnt come, just her general dislike of harry.



i think petunia might go, to get all the gossip and be ause she secretly wants harry to be happy.

and a wizard wedding is a way for her to be connected with the magical world. as she always wanted

Posted by: potterish10010 May 24 2009, 07:27 PM

I agree I think Dudley would definatly go and maybe Petunia, but not Vernon. I don't think Petunia would even be able to drag him there.

Posted by: Tom Bombadil Jun 4 2009, 07:14 PM

Ah, Harry and the Dursleys! I believe that Dudley made enough of a gesture to Harry in Deathly Hallowsto ensure that Harry wouldn't write him out of his life forever. He was also a terribly spoiled child who had been taught to hate the unknown and unfamiliar from birth. Harry's remarkable capacity to love, coupled with Dudley's beginnings of changing attitudes, might well result in him not only being invited but also attending Harry and Ginny's wedding. That's how I wrote it in my own story, so it obviously makes sense to me. Petunia and Vernon, though, should have known better. The hatred and fear were so completely inbred that I doubt they could overcome their disdain for Harry -- even though their lives had been saved by magical people!

Posted by: smallgirlmodel Jun 4 2009, 10:39 PM

Yeah i agree, I think Dudley will go and Petunia will show up, sit in the back, and probally leave right as soon the priest says" you may now kiss the bride". lol but Vernon definatly won't go, he could never stand to be around "Harry's lot". he's basically nontolerant of anything he dosnt understand or have control over.

Posted by: Dobbyfan96 Jun 5 2009, 02:01 PM

I always thought Harry+Ginny and Ron+Hermione were making some sort of double wedding.

Dudley and Petunia would definitly come but I think that Vernon+Petunia divorced after Dudley had his own family. I mean they never seamed lucky and then they had completly different feelings about the wizard world. ( On the beggining they hated ít both because Petunia was jealous of wizards and Vernon didn't like anything which was "not normal" but in DH I think that Petunia thought about her sister and evrything and yah changed her mind.)

About the party guests:
I think that Owain is quiet right about the party guests but I made some changes:

QUOTE(Owain @ Apr 3 2009, 01:33 PM) http://www.leakylounge.com/index.php?act=findpost&pid=1769203Groom: Harry Potter
Bride: Ginny Weasley
Officiating: Kingsley Shacklebolt
Best Man: Ron Weasley
Groomsmen: Neville Longbottom, Seamus Finnigan, and Dean Thomas
Maid of Honour: Luna Lovegood
Bridesmaids: Hermione Granger and two Gryffindor girls from Ginny's year
Parents of the Bride: Arthur and Molly Weasley
Standing in for the Parents of the Groom: Rubeus Hagrid and ?Minerva McGonaggal?
Ringbearer: Teddy Lupin
Flowergirl: Victoire Weasley
Guests: Charlie Weasley and guest, Bill and Fleur Weasley, Percy and Audry Weasley, George and Angelina Weasley, Muriel Weasley and guest, Gwenog Jones and guest, Pomona Sprout and guest, Filius Flitwick and guest, Horace Slughorn and guest, Dr. and Dr. Granger, Vernon (not sure) Petunia Dursley, Dudley Dursley and guest, Dedalus Diggle and guest, Elphias Doge and guest, Aberforth Dumbledore and guest, Arabella Figg and guest, Mundungus Fletcher and guest, Hestia Jones and guest, Sturgis Podmore and guest, Lee Jordan and guest, Kreacher, Augusta Longbottom and guest, Andromeda Tonks and guest, Hannah Abbott, Katie Bell and guest, Susan Bones and guest, Terry Boot and guest, Lavender Brown and guest, Cho Chang and guest, Michael Corner and guest, Dennis Creevey and guest, Justin Finch-Fletchley and guest, Anthony Goldstein and guest, Ernie Macmillan and guest, Padma Patil and guest, Parvati Patil and guest, Alicia Spinnet and guest, Oliver Wood and guest, Demelza Robbins and guest, Ritchie Coote and guest, Jimmy Peakes and guest, Aurora Sinistra and guest, Sybill Trelawney and guest, Firence and guest, Grawp, Poppy Pomfrey and guest, Rolanda Hooch and guest, Winky and guest, Gabrielle Delacour and guest, Viktor Krum and guest, Rolf Scamander, the other Gryffindors in Ginny's year and guests (but not all of them), the two unnamed Gryffindor girls in Harry's year and guests, the dates of Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas (if not among those already mentioned), the dates of Ginny's two unnamed bridesmaids (if not already mentioned), the family of Dir Cresswell and (after this much time) a guest of the widow Cresswell and the older sons, and the rest of the extended Weasley clan
Where the wedding takes place:
THe bureauw

Posted by: Owain Jun 13 2009, 03:09 PM

I'm glad you like most of my list but can I ask why the changes, Dobbyfan? My thought was for a fairly inclusive wedding where every surviving, loyal members of the DA, the OotP, the Hogwarts Staff, and the Gryffindor Quidditch Team would be invited. I thought that the experiences of the War would create a sense of camaraderie, if not always friendship, which superseded any past tensions. It's equally plausible that Harry and Ginny might have a small wedding with only family and close friends. However, I'm not sure why you cut some peripheral guests and not others. Hestia Jones only encounters Harry once, when she shows up for Dursley guarding duty, and they make no real connection. Is she really more important to Ginny and him than, say, Parvati Patil? I know this is supposed to be about the Dursleys but I think we need an overall concept of what the wedding might be like before we can see where the Dursleys fit in.

Gwenog Jones-She's the captain of Ginny's team.
Vernon Dursley-I really do think he would get at least a courtesy invitation. Harry couldn't really invite Petunia without inviting Vernon. He might not come but Harry would have to invite or not invite them as a couple unless he wanted to be pointedly and unnecessarily insulting. I think he'd be past that point. I don't think they divorced. Petunia turned around and held back from actually saying anything at the end of DH. Hardly a radical conversion.
Terry Boot-He's a member of the DA. Not Harry or Ginny's best friend but Harry taught him, he was with Ginny during the year of guerrilla warfare against Snape and the Carrows.
Lavender Brown-Same analysis as Terry.
Cho Chang-I can see the reason for the change here. She's the groom's ex and there might be some tension. Still, she came back to fight and I think Harry would want to be conciliatory. Ginny can afford to be gracious on her wedding day. Besides, if Mundungus Fletcher gets to stay on the list, I don't think any DA member who fought in the Battle would be excluded. Also, if Dean gets to stay Groomsman, it's a bit unfair to exclude Cho.
Michael Corner-Switch Harry and Ginny's names and it's the same analysis as Cho.
Dennis Creevy-Come on! He was Colin's little brother.
Justin Finch-Fletchley-Same analysis as Terry and Lavender.
Anthony Goldstein-Same as Terry, Lavender, and Justin
Ernie Macmillan-Same as the other DA members
Padma Patil-Ditto
Parvati Patil-In addition to all the DA stuff, she was Harry's classmate for six years
Demelza Robbins-She was teammate to Harry and Ginny. How come Katie can stay and she can't?
Ritchie Coote-Same as Demelza
Jimmy Peakes-Same
Aurora Sinistra-One of Harry and Ginny's professors.
Rolf Scamander-He's going to marry Luna. They'd probably already be at least dating by this point unless you think the wedding happened a week after the Battle or something. If Luna's a bridesmaid, he gets to be at the wedding.

LassieLupin, I'm not so sure. It would be tempting for Harry but I'm not so sure Ginny would want a small wedding and I'm certain Molly wouldn't. I think they might wait a little longer and Harry's weariness with everyone after the Battle might be replaced with a desire to share a moment of joy with all the people he'd shared so much suffering with. Even if it weren't, I think Molly would overrule him. We saw Bill and Fleur's wedding. I mean, was Elphias Doge there because Bill or Fleur was a friend of his? Weddings are half for the parents. Even with your guest list, I would add Hannah and remove the maybe from Angelina simply because they would attend with their partners. And you really don't think Luna would be invited?

Posted by: Nymphabelle Jun 13 2009, 07:36 PM

I reckon Petunia and Vernon would go
Do you think they would let their little Duddykins go to a wedding full of wizards all alone?
I reckon they would only go out of fear, or protection of Dudley.
But I think that Dudley would go because he wanted to

Posted by: Dobbyfan96 Jun 18 2009, 04:53 AM

With all ex-boy friends of Ginny and ex-Girl friends of Harry it's like I mean I wouldn't invite my ex- boyfriend to my marriage that's simply funny. Whith Aurora Sinastra: She was the Arithmartik teacher of Hermine and not of Harry. And I am not sure if Ginny took Arithmartik

Posted by: horas1 Jul 6 2009, 10:00 AM

They could afford any type of wedding they wanted big or small. Harry being they type would depend of Ginny to do the planning as most women do. I think the only thing Harry would ask that it be a small wedding with only their friends.

If it was a large wedding most of the wizarding world would show up being
how famous Harry is. The only muggle's would be Hermione's Parents and perhaps Duddly as a gesture of good will. At least a couple of squibs, Miss Figg of course would be one. All of the Ron's family, Shaklbolt. Maybe some magical creatures Hermione would insist on that.


horas1

Posted by: lupinwandcaster Jul 9 2009, 10:14 PM

I feel like the Dursleys would be invited, but they would decline and send a blender as a gift. There is a chance Dudely might go though.

Posted by: snoops Jul 16 2009, 12:55 PM

The dursley would definitely been invited. Dudley would have gone to the wedding. Vernon would stay away from harry's lot. The question is would petunia have gone to the wedding. I am not sure that she could bring herself to go. Having been so disappointed as a child not to be allowed at Hogwarts.

Posted by: snape87 Jul 16 2009, 09:01 PM

I think that harry would invite them but petunia and vernon would not come because petunia is scared of the wizarding world and she knows it would be full of witchs and wizards and she hated her sister so much for being a witch and vernon wouldn't come cause petunia would not let him but i could see dudley coming MAYBE cause they hav never really gotten along so thats a ? still to me. -.-

Posted by: ILoveHogwarts09 Jul 19 2009, 09:42 AM

I think that he would invite them. I do recall that harry and dudley are on Christmas Card terms so i think that he would attend. As for Petunia and Vernon.....i dont really know. I want to believe that in the time after DH but before the prolog that they reconsiled and that Petunia realized that the wizarding world is not scary. So i hope that they would attend but in reality to the book....i dont think that they would have attended.